Westerners confronted with an Asian style toilet have a single universal reaction: How the hell do I use this thing? For men the answer isn’t so difficult, but for women the sense of dismay when confronted with an Asian toilet is acute. At the risk of being vulgar, how does one keep from getting urine all over one’s pants and or shoes? Just what are the logistics of this particular toilet design?

The answer: one has to learn to do the Asian Squat. Which is, of course, easier said than done. In a Western Style squat, one is on one’s toes with the thighs parallel to the ground. In an Asian style squat, the feet are flat on the ground and the thighs at an angle almost perpendicular to the ground. It can be quite difficult to learn to balance like that as an adult expat confronted with an Asian toilet for the first time. (One tip: it’s easier to balance in this type of squat when one is wearing heals. Sorry male readers, I have no tips for you).

Once you do get the hang of the Asian Squat though, it’s easy to see why Chinese people squat so much in every day life. While the Western Squat is uncomfortable for long periods, the Asian Squat is actually quite comfortable. It doesn’t put stress on the shins or thighs in the same way that the Western Squat does. (One drawback to the Asian Squat is that one can’t do it in a mini-skirt the way one can a Western Squat.)

People squat everywhere and any when in China: while they’re waiting for the bus or subway, while they’re working. Sometimes you’ll even see groups of people squatting in a circle on the street corner, just chatting or playing cards or chess. Squatting is how the Chinese wait when they’re tired of standing. It’s how they loiter and chill with their friends.

The phenomenon creates a bit of a chicken or egg question. Are there so few public benches because people squat instead and thus there is little demand, or do people squat because there are so few public benches? Whatever the answer, the course of action is clear: No chair available? Just  do the Asian Squat!

Those interested in learning how to do the Asian Squat may find this instructional video helpful:

1) danielhsia.com

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